My little man is gone. As I type, Ian is spending his first weekend away from home; he is staying with his grandmother in Marshall; Ian will be gone the entire weekend – we don’t pick him up until Monday morning. What am I going to do with a full weekend without Ian around? It honestly took me at least a half an hour to let him leave with my mother. I know he is going to be alright, but he was put into a car that drove off without me. Call me hormonal if you want, but I did tear up. I started crying again when I got home and went into our bedroom and noticed the crib. It was 9pm and Ian wasn’t sleeping in it. He wasn’t in the apartment at all. I have been with Ian every hour since he was born. That’s 3 months – or 13 weeks or 88.5 days or 2129 hours – of being constantly with him and now I’m expected to spend 72 hours without him. My arms feel empty.

Okay, I’ll admit, I am being hormonal about this, but I haven’t been in an apartment where he wasn’t there as well. He has been attached to me for a year now (literally considering he was inside me for 9.5 months) and now that he isn’t here, it’s odd and kind of feels wrong.